(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

Last Friday I was having dinner at Rosewater with a team member when something cool happened. We had just ordered drinks and were happily catching up when Graciela, our server, popped back by. Her electric smile, genuine connection and sincere optimism took all of our energy up 10 notches in about 90 seconds. It was as if her energy was on magical currents.

Our evening went from nice to amazing in a blink of an eye. And that’s when it hit us: sometimes all you need is a 90-second refresh.

THE SCIENCE BEHIND 90 SECONDS

Now before you think I’m getting all woo-woo on you, I decided to see what was out there on “90 seconds” and guess what? Science supports it.

According to Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, Harvard neuroanatomist (also known as “brain scientist”) and author of the book “My Stroke of Insight,” ninety seconds is all it takes to let go of a negative emotion.

For example, let’s say you’re stressed. Pause ninety seconds to label what you’re feeling...

(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

I’m taking a hard left this week to address something that I get asked about regularly.

Many of you know that during the pandemic I left a role I really enjoyed to start my own company. And now, when I’m out and about, I’m often asked: “Girl, how did you do it?”

Sounds straightforward enough. But this isn’t really what folks want to know. The question behind the question is, “Weren’t you scared?” or “How did you know you could make it work?”

So this week I thought we might rewind and level set. Last Thursday, I invited you to think about the power of reinvention. I used the analogy of surfers getting up on their board and asked you to notice the waves of opportunity in your own life.

As a reminder, reinvention is the action or process by which something is changed so much that it appears entirely new. So, if that’s the measure, I’m an expert in reinvention. I’ve paddled out into the sea more times than I can count. Sometimes I stood up on my boar...

(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

It’s summertime and I’m coming in with beach energy and little umbrellas on my mind.

I’m also completely inspired by surfers! First, because they casually enter the “home” of sharks and jellyfish like it’s just another day at the office. And second because they paddle, paddle, paddle, and then, just as a wave swells, they artfully stand up on their longboard and — if timed right — swoop along the shoreline with grace.

If you’ve been following us here on TechWire, you know we compare burnout to a marathon with a finish line that is woefully out of sight. If we move this analogy to the ocean, the equivalent is a surfer who paddles indefinitely in search of a wave — but can’t catch it.

But savvy surfers know a secret. They can sense the shift in the water, and at just the right moment, they confidently stand up and harness the energy of the wave instead of relying on their own strength.

That ‘right’ moment – that moment is the first step to Reinvent...

(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

If you’ve been following us here, you are familiar with our analogy for burnout… a never-ending marathon where somebody keeps moving the damn finish line.

Today, I want to talk to my cheerleaders who are standing on the sidelines holding bottles of water and signs that say, “Find Your Happy Pace!” I know you mean well, but be careful you’re not unintentionally slipping into the realm of “cruel optimism.”

Cruel optimism is a phrase invented by Lauren Berlant and adopted by Johann Hari author of Stolen Focus.  He describes it as taking a really big problem with deep causes in our culture (like burnout) and offering a simplistic individual solution in upbeat language.

Here’s how it plays out for our marathon runners.

You’re hot, tired and on mile marker ‘who knows what at this point’.  You’re scouring the countryside for a viable off-ramp when friends on the sideline call out.

“Hey! You look tired, get some electrolytes in ya!”  and

“You’re doing ...

So last week I wrote about the never-ending marathon that is burnout. You cross that coveted 26.2 mile marker only to discover the finish line was moved. You keep running a little dazed and confused and think to yourself, “what fresh hell is this?”

That’s what burnout can feel like.

But the reality is we can’t run forever – none of us were built to run indefinitely.

So what do we do? We look for off ramps.

One off-ramp, while tempting, can actually backfire on you. Can you guess what that is?

Quitting your job. (Hello, Great Resignation!)

Here’s what happens. You’re exhausted and burned out. So you say, “Drop the mic! Deuces; I’m out.” It feels GREAT to quit. You throw open the door to the next chapter, smiling ear-to-ear.

(Quick caveat: changing jobs can be the best thing that happens to you. I know. I’ve made a career from reinventing myself many times over…but before you hit send on that resignation email, hear me out.)

The problem is that your ‘replacement theory’ won’t pla...

(First appeared in WRAL Techwire.)

Okay… I’m not a long-distance runner. Never have been…never will be. Marathons are built for a special kind of person. But as I continue to interview executives for my series on burnout, one analogy keeps coming up.

Imagine you’re running a marathon. You’ve trained for months, and you’ve made it through arduous hours of running. And then… just as you approach the 26.2 mile marker, just as you think relief and a glorious shower are ahead, you discover… oh, God no… it can’t be…

Somebody has moved the finish line. 

Shoot me now!

You already knew running 26.2 miles was going to require everything in you, and now you have to keep running. You have no idea where the new finish line is. You don’t have a clue when you’ll get to stop. And what the what?! Other runners are sprinting past you!  How did this happen??

Your legs feel like lead. You want to collapse on the pavement into a puddle of tears because there’s no end in sight.

This is what burnout f...

(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

“Education is the most powerful weapon you can use to change the world.”

– Nelson Mandela.

Greetings from Lambertville – the sweetest little town you’ve probably never heard of.  Known as the ‘Antiques Capital of New Jersey,’ this town sits confidently on the banks of the Delaware River showing off its eclectic art galleries, charming coffee shops, and the inn where Aaron Burr fled after he killed Alexander

Hamilton. It’s a whole vibe.

On Sunday, I made the 56-minute drive from Philadelphia to Lambertville with a singular mission – to dial in my craft of public speaking. On Monday morning, I climbed to the second floor of an old lace factory where the world’s most rigorous and intensive keynote speaker training goes down. In order to attend you have to be invited and you have to be committed to the idea that a speech has the power to change the world and the people in it…including the speaker. I was fortunate to receive an invitation to attend th...

(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)

Last week I had the opportunity to sit down with Rashida Hodge, Vice President of Data and AI Customer Success at Microsoft. It was easily one of my favorite conversations of the year. While our full interview will be available on the Reinvention Road Trip podcast in the next two weeks, I couldn’t wait to share a few of her leadership nuggets.

Nugget #1 – “We all have thorns; but we don’t talk about them… and we should.”

Right off the top, Rashida wanted me to know that she’s a woman of Caribbean soil and a child of perseverance. She draws on both in her leadership roles. And while she gets a lot of attention for her many awards and achievements, she is quick to remind me that there is more to her than her professional milestones.

“Hey, I’ve been through some things. I’ve been denied, and it’s important to remember that we can build from our circumstances regardless of the cards we’re dealt.”

Rashida reflected on her mom’s influence throughout ou...

(First appeared in WRAL Techwire.)

Here’s a relatively unknown fact about me. I’m a true crime junkie. I can’t get enough of these six-part, real life “who-done-its” and unsolved mysteries. I listen to podcasts, watch documentaries and like so many of my true crime aficionados I believe, beyond a shadow of doubt, that if I were invited to help solve a crime, I would have the chops to untangle the web of evidence and sift through the dead ends to find the culprit.

I’ve been putting these amateur sleuthing skills to work by interviewing some of the top executives in the region to better understand the cultural changes happening within their companies. We’ve covered burnout, leadership, hybrid work environments and the new rules of employee engagement. These perspectives are important because there’s a culture groundswell afoot. Companies everywhere are asking critical questions around supportive work environments and the type of leadership required to support and retain talent.

Accord...

(First appeared in WRAL Techwire.)

We’re interrupting our series on burnout this week to share a few highlights from a panel discussion I participated in on Tuesday hosted by the Kenan Institute-affiliated Entrepreneurship Center and the Research Triangle Foundation. I was joined by Jami Stewart, vice president of customer experience for Cisco Systems Inc. and Arvind Malhotra, UNC Kenan-Flagler Business School Professor. We discussed Designing Work for Attracting & Retaining Talent.

If you missed it, enjoy a few of the highlights captured by Rob Knapp, External Affairs Associate at Frank Hawkins Kenan Institute of Private Enterprise.

Hybrid work scheduling is here to stay, and it points to a broader incentive that companies can offer as part of employee recruiting and retention.

“’Hybrid’ is the word we use, (but) I think the real thing is ‘choice,’” said Jami Stewart, Cisco Systems Inc.

Offering choices requires trust, however, and it’s something that consultant, coach and author J...